Digging out of the chaos

Week 4: operation dig out of our stuff.
I am finally starting to see the light. No stress about it this week. My biggest struggle is trying to actually get the junk out of my car and in to a charity shop. What? You say maybe you don't want my free junk?! Someone's junk is another's treasure, people. Don't forget it. 

Yesterday and today I have driven all over looking for a shop or bin to take my stuff. No takers yet. Mostly they were just closed or full. Nobody has ACTUALLY rejected my stuff yet. 

I am finally seeing empty drawers and cupboards. I can take a few days off from maniacal clutter clearing to get my resume updated and apply for a few jobs. Yay! 

Augis list...

What happened to pollies, barbies, and princess dress ups? This year it's books, journals, and robots.

Letters to Santa

It's time to get these letters out. Ems choices were a complete surprise to me. He really wants the doggy poo clean up game. Ridiculous.  He forgot it on his list...but maybe someone will remember...like mum.

Decluttering

Here is my story. Have a seat, because this is going to be a long one. Nearly four years ago we cleared out our house and came to England with 3 suitcases each. It was sooooo refreshing to not have so much "stuff." We could move anywhere and not have the baggage. We were starting over as minimalists and didn't even know it! Well...fast forward 4 years. We are looking at moving across the world again and I am looking around in horror at all of the stuff we have once again accumulated. We are all guilty, but I am most guilty. I have 14 all-black dresses. FOURTEEN! I have 6 cases of Oolong Tea. Does tea go bad? I DON'T EVEN KNOW! That is seriously like over 1000 bags of tea. I don't even like Oolong, it tastes like socks and dirt (not to be confused with dirty socks). If  I stop and think...what will I grab on the way out if there is a fire...the answer is: only my children, husband and dog. Seriously. I can't think of one thing we have that is not easily replaceable.

How did we get here again? In my only attempt to justify it, most of what we have came at a BARGAIN from boot sales, charity shops, and friends. I feel a sense of accomplishment to get something at a steal. But, it isn't a steal because in the end I run around like a nut trying to organize it all into containers.

So the decluttering has begun. My goals for decluttering are that I will spend less money and spend less time organizing so that I have more time to enjoy my family and friends.

Week 1: I just started walking through the house gathering things we don't need, things that are broken, etc. I had a car load to take to the recycle center and another carload to take to the thrift store. The kids were fabulous. Em chose some large cars to give to a neighbor, Augi chose armloads of dolls and stuffed toys to donate, and both kids gave up their little people toys that have been boxed up. Chris is even selling his least favorite Fairey prints! I was feeling great by the end of the week, it was kind of fun. But, I realized I couldn't maintain this pace and still have a happy home life.

Week 2: I gathered up all of the art and school work we have stored away. Dated and took pictures of it all to have record in case it doesn't last. Sorted through all of it and kept the best work. Created a folder of art and school work for each kid. 3 years fit in one folder each. Em has already enjoyed looking through his folder and it was fun to talk about how he has grown.

Week 3: Completely crazy and unfocused. Spinning. Two car loads to the charity shop, another one ready to go. I couldn't figure out where to start or stop. I felt embarrassed that I have been such a consumer and collected complete junk. I had two panic attacks by the end of the weekend. (by the way, I still haven't parted with the Oolong tea. Maybe you will be lucky enough to get a case for Christmas!)

Here I am.  Hundreds of objects gone. I don't even feel a dent has been made. I want this to be an organized challenge like..."10 items a day" or "30 minutes a day." I am impulsive, though, and I need immediate reinforcement. My reward has got to be as strong as that feeling I get from getting a really good deal on an awesome new black dress. I'm going to give up soon. Any ideas?

The Recluse.

I'm not trying to be a recluse. I have been incredibly busy and overwhelmed emotionally lately. A lot has been brewing on this side of the pond. 

Here is a recap of the last few months:

We went to the States. We returned to England. One of my best friends was fired from our workplace for no reason. I was reprimanded at our workplace because I have a big mouth. I have worked on my workplace mouth opening-ness. The kids started back to school. They love it. The days have gotten shorter. Augi had a horrible allergic reaction to...kitties. Phiz ate our birdie Peppi. We got a new birdie Lavender. We celebrated Halloween. I ran over my first muntjac. Our other best friends moved away. I was offered a new contract. We did not like said contract. My office mate was made redundant. We negotiated a shorter contract. I found an awesome job to apply for in a currently undisclosed location. I applied. 

Now we wait.

I HATE WAITING.

As I begin to learn and PRACTICE mindfulness and minimalism, I am constantly aware of how hard these two concepts are for me. I continually leap out of the joy I have in my life RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT to worry about  shipping ourselves and our belongings all over the freaking world in a few months, finding a job, deciding where to live, etc. 

Then I hyperventilate and scream at my family. 

Then I take a breath. I remember how much I love my husband and my children. I remember I how fun it is to just hang with them. I become grounded. And laugh with them. 

Our little town. Showing off it's gay pride next to it's politically incorrect pub.

Augi snuggling kittens before realizing...

Her beginning allergic reaction to the kitties. Pre-ambulance. 

Phiz snuggling her baby.

Buddies. We 3 have been going on walks almost every night. I love this time with Emmett. He jabbers and yells and runs and pretends. He likes to be a spy or a super hero. He trains Phiz. He teases and hides. He argues and negotiates. 

The Halloween Gang.

Em's best friend H. They are two peas in a pod. 

Augi and her new bestie M. and her old bestie B. She loves these girls. I will do everything I can to keep them in touch for many years to come.

Buddy and his new partner Lavender.

Preparing for a walk. Em is finicky about his clothing. He likes to be unique and cool. I believe he pulls it off!

Phiz is so weird.

Some Halloween fun.

My girl.

Bonfire night at MH. 

FRIENDS.

Em has followed his sister's lead. He loves to make "potions."

All of the stress is worth it if I get my kids, my husband, and our friends. This life is a crazy ride. 

The Rivertons

If you know us, you know about the family that we have claimed as our besties since just a few months after arriving in England. Let's call them the Riverton's (for privacy's sake on my public blog). 

Earl, Charlene, Angel, and Ferb Riverton. Oh, and we can't forget little baby Eunice. 

We had an automatic connection with the Rivertons: we were all in the same boat of living overseas, thousands of miles away from everything we were used to with a 4 year old and a toddler. However, I do not want you to assume that we were only friends because of necessity. No. Freakin. Way.

Here is the condensed story. 

3 1/2 years ago, Chris started going to a play group organized through the medical group on the base, primarily for stay at home dads. He met Earl and Ferb. We eventually arranged a get together and met in the little crooked village of Lavenham. It was the first time I had met the Rivertons, although I had heard Chris talk about Earl and the children. I have to admit I was a little intimidated by Charlene at first. She seemed so well put together and so stinking smart. I worried whether or not she liked me. Her kids were super duper cute. Augi and Angel hit it off immediately. Emmett and Ferb were just toddlers but seemed content to hang around each other...all you can expect from a tot.

That was the beginning. We started to hang out on the weekends or meet at different touristy sites. We didn't see Charlene much. She was busy working. Then, she got deployed. For 6 months, during her deployment, we had movie night just about every Friday. I guess I just felt so much empathy for her because of our children being similar ages. I could imagine the pain of being away from them. Earl definitely did his part and held it together. We had so much fun. I felt a connection with him like a long lost much older brother. Augi and Angel played and fought like cousins. Chris had someone to talk at, captive, for hours. I got to snuggle Ferb, who was just a bit younger than Emmett. 

Charlene returned from deployment and we continued our frequent dates. Their family grew with baby Eunice. We have rarely gone more than a week or so without a family get-together. 

Well, we knew England would be temporary for all of us. Tonight was the dreaded night for me. It was time to say goodbye and have our last get-together in England. The Rivertons will get on an airplane tomorrow to the US.

Here are some things I would like to say to them but couldn't say  through my blubbery sobs.

Earl, I have laughed more with you than anyone, ever. You are an awesome friend. 

Charlene, you amaze me. You have sacrificed for your family as well as your country, no matter what that horrible place tried to brainwash you into believing about yourself.

Angel, you are such a smarty pants. You are an entertainer but also a sweet, caring little lady. 

Ferb, there is a big place in my heart that belongs just to you. 

Eunice, you have super yummy cheeks.

Thank you to all of you for including us in your lives. 

I love all of you.

Augi told me tonight, through her sobs, that her "heart hurts so much." I told her, "I know. Mine too." 

 I think Winnie the Pooh summed it up best:

 "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard."